Mafia Wars!!

People!! Here I am, with another possible avenue for all of us to waste our precious time...Join the MAFIA WARS on facebook! It's a really cool game with immense scope for expansion of our gang. Join in, fight, earn money and our gang shall rule. To join, click on the status on my profile on facebook...!!

nice joke

PERFECT TREE SHOT

A guy stands over his tee shot for what seems an eternity: looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the damn ball!"

The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."

"Forget it, man," says his partner. "You'll never hit her from here."

Where the Fuck are all the velas???

People!! This is the time!! You are all at home...doin nothing except eat, shit nd sleep. It is my sincere request that you all use this blog as the waste basket fr your thoughts. And as an added topic, might I add, opinions on the world cup are also welcome. As a start, I think the aussies suck nd may dey rot in hell.
Other's opinions are, as always, more than welcome!

To Jesus

I'm on the corner, waiting for a light to come on
That's when I know that you're alone
It's cold in the desert, water never sees the ground
Special unspoken without sound

You told me you loved me, that I'd never die alone
Hand over your heart, let's go home
Everyone noticed, everyone has seen the signs
I've always been known to cross lines

I've never ever cried when I was feeling down
I've always been scared of the sound
Jesus don't love me, no one ever carried my load
I'm too young to feel this old

Is it you, is it me
Or does nobody know, nobody see
Nobody but me
-The Holy bible

KAHANI GHAR GHAR KI...??? ( does it sounds familiar..)

so here i am.. resting my ass on the bed after a delicious dinner.. it feels so great to be at home...a place which you have always known so well.. everything is so homely about it..the food, the bed, the water..and never to forget the language...given my case the language part is really important...anyways the only problem that lies ahead of me is the stupid TV serials that i am forced to watch...
the first thing that comes in my mind after seeing these serials is that all of them are made to target the housewives. I exactly dont know the reason but all i can say is that the story of most of the tv serials deal with the great INDIAN NAARI in some way or the other. As far as i know this all started from the great Ekkkkta kkkapors Kkyunki...God !!!!!! the ekkkta effect did unite every housewife against the fictional attrocities of their mother in laws , sister in laws and their husbands and god knows what...Hmm..Ekkkta (the girl with a laaal tiikkka...) changed the whole way the indian tv serials were made.. she brought in the family effect not to mention the bitching , the back stabbing women blessed with immortality. I say immortal because the passing years never reflected any change on them. They were all blessed with long lives and they were always so young...
Nevertheless i find it really amusing to note that how contrasting the 80 mm screen is from these serials. One of the basic difference lies is the main character of the both serials and films. Its the male character who gets the major chunk of the screen space and importance in case of films and on the other hand its the female character whos the boss in these serials...hmm gender equality or is it the compensation...???
I believe apart from the story and the usual overflow of emotion, fashion also plays equally important part in the TRP ratings (though i really dont know what does that mean)..you cant ignore the fashion when it comes to women..i mean i am sure that some ladies out there must be indulging themselves into these shows to also see the various sarees or the jwelleries shown..
To tell you the truth even i would have loved ( i am not sure of this folks..) these shows had it been a little fast. The most annoying thing about these shows is its pace. The director really makes it a point to capture every single angle of a particular expression, even if it shows the same person repeating the dialogue again and again (may be say the 5th or the 6th time..) .. the director makes sure that he captures the expression of everyone whos present in that particular scene when a dialogue is being delievered.. not to forget the over acting also spoils the mood.
No wonder i just like watching movies where they keep all the emotions packed up for just 3 hours. Nevertheless i feel “Dekh bhai dekh” was a serial that i really liked..May be one or two more but right now i cant remember their names...anyways i know many people would differ from my views but i do hope to find few people in support of my views... Please God, bless these producers with some good piece of mind so that they make something more rational, something more entertaining apart from their usual GHAR GHAR KI KAHANI...!!!

THE TIME OUT..!!!

In due time, I have observed that letting your feelings and emotions flow out really helps you to cool down and what better way than just write about it. So here i am blogging about what goes in my mind this time. I am penning this down to register my frustration about the different “pace” with which various things happen in and around me and my inability to match with it. That goes for mostly when I want things to move at faster rate than its present rate. Though rare, but sometimes I really wish things to slow down but never do they turn out the way i want them to.

 I so wish that we better had control of setting up the pace of our own life. For example, some people like walking leisurely while some don’t. And when these two crowds meet, there are few “ANGRY” exchanges. Wouldn’t it have been a lot better, if these two different sections of the people had their own choice of pace at their own choice of time? Had it never occurred to you that you tend to do things at an adopted rate, a rate which most of the times isn’t set by you but by the circumstances.

It really becomes annoying when you wanted your life to run at a faster lane but being overcrowded you move on a much slower lane or sometimes you don’t even move. The speed of internet, for that instance is worth mentioning. Ever been in a situation during a lecture, when you feel you got what your “GURU” wanted you to know, but still find him/her repeating the concepts again and again due to same reason of taking everyone in consent. Ever been in a queue outside ATM centres when you are in a hurry and the person inside is running things at his own frame of time. It’s not always the switch from the fast to slow but the other way around is equally frustrating. Being stuck in the exam periods, always wanting for some extra time when you know you wouldn’t get any. It truly is frustrating for me.

No offense to anyone, but it turns out the segregation of these two different section of people is quite necessary for the betterment of both. An option of Life in faster lane and Life in slower lane should really be available though I really think I am asking for too much. I always wished to have a control over such things and this would definitely be one of the first wish that i would ask from THE JEANIE. A better gift for the mankind would be a control over the flow of time, though i really don’t know whether that would ever happen or not. May be i am hoping against a hope..GOD, I do feel a lot better speaking out my mind. Blogging is indeed fun..!!!

PS:- Looking forward to your comments.

Insomnia

It's four in the morning, and I sit in front of a computer, trying desperately to kill time till they start serving breakfast in the mess. Presuming that I am assuming right, most of you too have been here...awake in the middle of the night, without a trace of sleep, trying hard to figure out what to do with all the time that you have. I am faced with the same dilemma, and when one has a lot of time at his/her disposal, and no job at hand, weird, uncanny and bizarre thoughts start treading one's mind. It's inevitable I guess. So I was thinking about all the funny advertisements people come up with on television. Although I must accept, It irritates me to the core when a stupid guy comes in the middle of my fav movie trying to sell me some crappy washing powder. And I am of the firm opinion that never buy anything for which they advertise too much. After all, a road less trodden is less trodden for a reason. These advertisement folks would tell you what you want to hear. To be frank, Advertisement is actually legalized lying, nothing more, nothing less. But there is hardly anything I can do about it, so I started paying attention to those silly 2 min ads. Here are a few anomalies I found out in the seemingly full-proof advertisement on which a company just spent crores....

1) The Girls they show in these ads....I can’t figure out their expressions! No matter what they are selling, the faces they make, the clothes they wear, it seems they are going to have an orgasm within the next 2 mins! I am yet to understand what is it about a stupid toothpaste that makes them so excited. After all, it does creates an awkward situation when one is sitting with family, nicely watching a movie, and all of a sudden the girl starts moving seductively, in the shortest possible skirt, singing ballads of airtel.

2) There’s an ad in particular I remember. It was for a washing powder, if I am not wrong. The husband comes into the house, tired and weary. His shirt has blood stains on it. The wife sees him, and smiles. And says ,”abhie saaf ho jayega ji”. And she goes ahead with the shirt and, as expected, the shirt comes out as clean as ever! Now, never for once I doubted the quality of the washing powder throughout the ad. But if I were the wife, laundry wouldn’t have been my biggest worry at that point of time! Get rid of the body first, stupid woman!!

3) Well the third point has nothing to do with advertisements, but I feel strongly about it anyways. Cookery Shows. What’s the point? What are they trying to do??
I will never understand why they cook on TV. I can't smell it. Can't eat it. Can't taste it. The end of the show they hold it up to the camera, "Well, here it is. You can't have any. Thanks for watching. Goodbye.

I had planned to end this here, but the thoughts haven’t stopped coming. I was reading about Switzerland the other day. The swiss haven’t been in a war for the past 500 years! Pretty impressive yr, looking at us here in India. But I think it’s rather lucky for them. Ever see that little swiss army knife they have to fight with??Not much of a weapon according to me. Nail cutter, bottle openers and stuff. If the time came for a war, people would be shouting all over ,”Hey man!back off!!I got my nail cutters right here and the bottle opener battalion would be here any minute!”.

Some of you must have read the book “A brief History of Time” by Stephen Hawkings. Amazing book with theories and supporting text on space-time continuum. Well I was thinking....at times when you ask other people, “how far is the foodcourt??” and they answer ,”20 mins”. But here I find an inconsistency with Mr.Hawking’s text! This conversion of time and distance cannot be reversed!! For instance ,”when do your classes get over?” ”Around 3 kilometers”.

Hehe...looks like I can’t sleep without wasting a substantial share of my day. After all this gibberish, I feel sleepy. Do feel free to comment on my thoughts, and keep posting folks.
Ciao ppl!!