THE BIGGEST BULLSHITTER

  “Men are wise until they speak”- or so goes the saying. Hence it is quite an irony that brains regarded as being among the top ten thousand out of almost a lac who strived for a seat in VIT, are capable of so much of relentless utter nonsense. Non sense I admit is a derogatory term to use in this situation; or at least if you ask the stalwarts of such inveterate lectures, they would protest most vehemently. The correct term to be used here should be ”bakchodi”, and ingenious invention by some brilliant literary fanatic who chose to answer the plight of all the college going youth to add some air of respect to their ramblings by coining this radical terminology! Hence “Bakchodi” has been heralded as the new channel of making a social statement and “bakchods” are the new iconic figures in the college campuses all around the country, while people like me who are not yet caught up in the craze are left bamboozled!

 Nevertheless, keeping into consideration the big majority who actually like it, i put forward the names of a few torch bearers in this avenue, without whom the noble art of “bakchodi” would not have  seen the bright light of day! First comes  the name of the undisputed king, the reigning champion of bullshitting, Akshay. Cracking the most obnoxious and brainless of jokes is his forth. To prove my claim I,hereby exhibit one of his anecdotes- “Raeth ko tawai pe garam karne se kya milta hai?……Sandipan!”

 A close second is the hefty presence of  Harshit, one who feels that it is a great sin to not utter sound! It is said that once he was clocked at a record of 6 hours of constant chattering in one day; quite a feat considering the the normal human being only sleeps an hour or so more! Be it world politics, Manchester United, his exploits as a Casanova, or any miscellaneous topic, he can always be depended upon for his wise words.

 The next in lineage is Vipin. Now I admit that I know very little about his achievements in this field. Still I have heard that his slight physiology holds a great prowess for bullshit (figuratively speaking of course!).

 Tau or Sourav Shankar’s name comes next in mind. Now when the great actor Heath Ledger tragically passed away, it seems he didn’t find the right way up. Instead his spirit has been housed in the most contrasting of a frame, our beloved Sourav. Thus we keep on receiving dialogue after dialogue as SMSes on our cell phones from the role of Joker in Dark Knight. When confronted with this, he merely quips,” It’s just so much fun, why so serious?”

 The new kid on the block is Tanuj. Now, his inception into this elite group has been due to his performances on our trip to Yercaud. Allegedly Santu heard from the locals of some legend of a wild and fearsome bison roaming the terrain. This had induced in Tanuj a sixth sense, if you can call it so, to find the creature’s grotesque figure in almost every innocent tangible object that makes the mistake of coming in his eye sight. His cries of ‘Bhaison, Bhaison!’ reverberated throughout the valley quite frequently.

  Now who is the head of the gang, is for the commoners to decide. I can only proclaim that this lords of lousy language have already done enough for “bakchodi” to be called a new social revolution!